Abundance

The impending New Year always makes me reflective and introspective. A little nostalgic, a little excited for a fresh start. What about you? 2018 has been a year of complicated feelings. There has been so much hope mingled with such devastating disappointment. Happiness colored by heartache. But the thing that this year, this season of …

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I’m not going to have a baby in 2019

We were discussing the pros and cons of the two insurance options our employer provides. Cost, previous experience, stress of choosing new doctors. Neither one was going to cover our fertility treatments moving forward so that wasn't an issue. I really wanted to switch providers because I didn't want to be insured by the one …

Hey Jealousy

Sometimes people ask if it's hard for me to be around their kids because of our infertility... the short answer is No. I don't know if that's true for everyone facing infertility. But it's true for me. It does not upset me to be around and love on your children. They are so uniquely them, …

Dear Nashville

Dear Nashville, You are an amazing city. You stole my heart when Belmont Orientation opened my eyes to all you had in store. I saw fireflies for the first time. It was pure magic, and I've loved you ever since. I spent five years growing under your watch. Learning, performing, creating, failing, and loving. Endless …

Messy Middle

I keep waiting for the happy ending. The triumphant victory of two hard won pink lines that leads to joy with our loved ones and concludes with a gorgeous baby of our own. It hasn't happened yet. We are still in the middle. The messy middle of no. The never ending cycle of grief. The …

Sunday is Coming

Recently, I read a little quote about not allowing a season of loneliness to become a lifestyle of despair. And I blinked at the little bit of light peeking through the cracks in the cocoon of darkness surrounding me. My self-made cocoon of despair. I was already there. Trapped in this fog, this seemingly inescapable …